'Hilarious' DAILY MAIL 'Very entertaining' SUNDAY TIMES 'Amazing and brutally honest...brilliant' THE LAD BIBLE

'A gifted storyteller...absorbing and very funny' THE LIST 'Destined for bigger things' CHORTLE

Saturday, 4 July 2015

#35 An Open Letter To Sleep (from an exhausted new parent)

Dear Sleep,

My oldest, dearest friend.

Where have you been?

We had it all, me and you. We never left each other’s side - eight hours a night, more at weekends and even the occasional get-together in the afternoon. Sunday’s were our special day when we’d overdose in each other’s dreamy company until we both felt able to start the new week afresh.

Recently you started seeming distant and cold. Was it my fling with Coffee that pushed you away? 

You know damn well I was only with her because I was missing you. The more you rejected me the more you pushed me into her beany bosom. There wasn't a gulp of espresso I took where I didn't think of you. 

Last night you didn’t come home at all. Where the hell were you? I needed you today.

I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to snap. I’m just so…tired. I can’t think straight. I know what the end of my wits look like now, in graphic HD detail.

I need you here. You can straighten this all out.

Instead you're out there, cavorting with my friends, the ones without kids. I can't go on Facebook without reading all the disgusting, sordid details. 'Lovely lie in today'. 'Can't believe I slept for 10 hours straight!' You used to do that with me. I feel sick just thinking about it. 

I took you for granted, I understand that now. I realise we’ll never have what we used to but please, please come back into my life.

All my love and desperation.

An Exhausted New Parent x

Follow this blog on Facebook - click here and 'like' for daily updates. Or share using the buttons below.

8 comments:

Natalie said...

Oh I remember those days! And I'm totally empathizing for you over here!

Believe it or not, I wrote a similar post way back in 2010 that you might get a kick out of: http://mommyofamonster.com/2010/12/goodbye-my-friend-letter.html

Hang in there...it will get better (in a few years lol)

Tot Spots said...

Made my (sleep deprived) night. I dream of sleep!!! (Bad pun intended) :)

Sam Avery said...

Thanks Natalie, I'll have a look!

Sam Avery said...

Glad you enjoyed and as Super Furry Animals once sang, 'Happiness is a warm pun...'

Adrianne said...

Sleep? What is sleep? I think I have a vague recollection....

Candace Wright said...

Love it!

aliya seen said...

The sales letter services are sending educated correspondence, however it depends on the situation. You must know about it.

hoxn Ln said...

the wrist handbag replica instrument.B50 carrying homemade quartz movement Breitling B55 Chronograph watch intelligent UK Replica watches interaction (B55 Connected) although the added functionality and connectivity of Replica Rolex Watches smart phones, but this is mainly to further enhance the use of the table of the Lord comfort. Smart phones and Watches Replica smart watch two-way interaction, the two complement each other, the exhibition director. Designer handbags In screen-based smartphones.